The Web of Death!!!

The friendly spider you see over to your left, has been hanging around our house for the past couple of weeks. He/She seems to favor the large Holly bush that grows beside our front door. This spider strikes terror into the heart of my youngest daughter. She softly tip toes by it and darts through the front door. My son laughs but I know that deep down inside he is scared of it too.

Things weren't much different for me and my sisters back when I was growing up. It seemed that writing spiders were always spinning their webs somewhere around my parent's house.

According to information on Wikipedia, there is no reason to fear the writing spider: "Like almost all other spiders, Argiope are harmless to humans. Like most garden spiders they eat insects, and they are capable of consuming prey up to twice their size." I guess the genius that wrote that little fact wasn't raised in East, TN. While writing spiders may not be known for biting folks, there is another reason to fear them, read on...

Growing up here in Knox County, we had more than our fair share of old wife's tales and scary stories. I was told from a very young age that if a writing spider ever wrote your name in its web...you would die! It was always a constant fear of mine that one day I would be walking by one, look down at it, and read my name in its web.

Well, my older sister, Pam, knew about my web spinning fears and she used to taunt me with it. I remember one late summer evening, she came into the house with the most horrified look on her face. She walked up to me and said, "Byron, I've got some terrible news for you." "Wwwwhhhhat is it," I asked? Of course she went into this big theatrical production. "It's the worst thing that could ever happen to you," she said. I was getting really nervous. Finally she uttered these words: "You know that writing spider that we saw earlier today?" "Yeah," I said. "Well, I just came from outside and when I walked by it, I saw that it had written your name in it's web!" ..."Oh my dear Lord!" Fear beset me. What was I going to do? My short little life flashed before my eyes. "Oh Byron, I'm so sorry, this is terrible," still keeping up her little charade. I was really getting sick to my stomach. I had to see it for myself. I went out the back door, walked down the porch steps, and slowly made my way toward the spider. I glanced down at it, prepared to either run with all of my might in the opposite direction or drop dead on the spot. You can't imagine the relief that came over me when my name was not written in that web. I had a new lease on life! Of course Pam was standing on the porch watching the whole scene and laughing hysterically. I can't remember what I did to get her back but I know I got my revenge.

So, watch out for those writing spiders and pray that your name is not written in the WEB OF DEATH!!!

Here's a few more pics of our writing spider: